He comes through a whisper!

1 Kings 19:11-14
     "11 “Go out and stand before me on the mountain,” the Lord told him. And as Elijah stood there, the Lord passed by, and a mighty windstorm hit the mountain. It was such a terrible blast that the rocks were torn loose, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. 12 And after the earthquake there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire there was the sound of a gentle whisper.
13 When Elijah heard it, he wrapped his face in his cloak and went out and stood at the entrance of the cave. And a voice said, “What are you doing here, Elijah?”

The all mighty, all powerful God came to Elijah in a gentle whisper! The God who created Earth, and just a few verses before these, brought down fire from Heaven to burn up a drenching wet sacrifice; chose to show Himself to Elijah in the most gentle of ways. He wasn't in the wind, He wasn't in the Earthquake and He wasn't in the fire, no MY God; He comes through a whisper.

It's no wonder I have a hard time hearing Him sometimes. I keep looking for Him in the "powerful" things like fire, wind and Earthquakes; and forget to sit still and listen for the whisper. I almost want to end my blog right there today, because it's hard to make that point any more clear then it already is. But I feel like I need to say more, to try and get my own head to wrap around this whisper, and how to be quite enough to hear it! I've come back to finish my blog and it is several days later; as I'm reading over it I can tell that is all I need to say. I need to keep looking for God in the gentle things, and realize that His ways are not my own! Thanks God for the awesome reminder!

That's What Faith Can Do

I've written about this song before, but I had a random thought concerning it while on my way home this afternoon. The song is What Faith Can Do by Kutless.

The chorus has the words that struck me, so I'm going to post the words here and tell you my thoughts.

I've seen dreams that move the mountains
Hope that doesn't ever end
Even when the sky is falling
And I've seen miracles just happen
Silent prayers get answered
Broken hearts become brand new
That's what faith can do

Whenever this song comes on, I pretty much go into belting out the song mode. If you've ever met me I'm sure you've noticed that if I know the words to a song, and sometimes even if I don't, I'm singing along. Now if that song that I'm singing too is a moving ballad or a song that I "jam" too; then I move into what I cal belt out mode. Simply put that is where I sing at the top of my lungs; not caring who is watching or listening. It just so happens that I CAN sing; so I don't normally make ear drums bleed or anything. I was in this mode singing this song when I felt that tug to actually listen to what I'm singing. So I did.

The words Broken hearts become brand new; that's what faith can do hit me square in the face today. Here I've been on this journey to learn about patience and faith this year, and having a hard time waiting on God's will; and all along I've been looking at it wrong. I guess what I mean is that God asked me a question while I was listening to those words. His question went something like this; if I can make a broken heart brand new; and you don't doubt that; then why don't you have faith that I can heal you, and open your womb? It is a very valid question, I DO believe whole heartedly that He can change a person if they just ask Him too. I do believe that all I had to do was ask Him to forgive my sins; and tell Him he had my whole heart and it was a done deal. How much more faith can I have? Let me state it this way, when it comes to a healing it is ALL God, I can't do anything more to make my body reproduce or take away the pain I can get into; so God can just do His miracles and it's done. When it comes to accepting Jesus as my Lord and Savior there is a lot more human involvement in that one. I have to make that choice to accept Him, I have to actively seek Him and I have to want those changes in my life. As a human I am NOT divine and as a non-divine human I mess up a lot and I "change my mind" a lot. If I can trust that I was changed and that an UNSEEN God is now a part of my life without batting an eye; why is it so hard for me to trust that He can heal me? 

I don't have an answer for that right now, but I do know that it is going to take some soul searching to figure out where my lake of faith is coming from. I don't know if it is a deeply hidden thought that I'm not worthy of His healing, or if it's something more complex; like I'm hiding behind the lake of healing or something. What I do know is He loves me, and He sent His Son to die on a cross so that I could have these mixed up feelings. I also know that I can find hidden gems in the songs that I listen to; so the next time you are rocking out to a song (be it Country, Christian or Rock) take a moment and listen to the words and see if you don't hear something that might just make you pause and grow in your faith walk. 

I'm still learning folks, and I have a LONG way to go!

Acts 9: 33-34
    "33 There he met a man named Aeneas, who had been paralyzed and bedridden for eight years. 34 Peter said to him, “Aeneas, Jesus Christ heals you! Get up, and roll up your sleeping mat!” And he was healed instantly."

What power, what CONFIDENCE Peter showed here. I firmly believe that we all have this power; to heal and to do miracles in Jesus' name; but I feel few of us posses the faith to do it. That is what my blogging has been about this year, faith and patience. What I haven't figured out is how to achieve that faith, the undeniable belief that I really can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me.

Peter had the distinct advantage of walking the Earth with the Saviour and learning from Him; but it took the death of Jesus and Resurrection of Him to set Peter to his true potential. I have an advantage over Peter as well, what is my advantage? I knew, from the beginning, about Jesus' death and wonderful Resurrection! How is it that Peter has this awesome faith and I'm stuck writing a blog about patience and faith instead? I think part of that answer isn't so good; I think it may have something to do with how easy my relationship with God is. I'm not threaten by death on a daily basis just because I believe He died for my sins and rose again on the third day. I'm not hunted because I write about my faith (or lack there of) when I "get the chance". I can freely walk the globe with any "religious" symbol or shirt or sign that I want and no one can do anything about it. That seems pretty easy to me. Maybe if this freedom had been taken away from me at some point, or if I had escaped death that was to be my fate; purely because of my faith; then I'd understand where Peter got his faith and conviction.

I think it's safe to say that Peter's time with the Lord may have given him an edge; but I KNOW, in my heart of hearts, that this "edge" is mine for the taking as well. I just need to find the courage to reach out and grab it. Why is that so scary? Why do I feel as if, in doing that, I am falling through space? I guess that is a sign that I still need to work on my faith huh? Maybe it means that I don't yet have even a mustard's seed amount of faith.

I've been pretty busy at work, and I've found myself somewhat skimming through my daily Bible readings; mostly hoping something will pop out at me that I can use in a blog. I'm pretty sure that isn't how God intended my study time to go. I was even doing this today, struggling with my sense of justice and how I sometimes don't understand God's way...even when I can see the whole story; when I ran across this verse. It sort of hit me in the "faith gut" if you will. It screamed to me, HEY PETER WAS JUST A PERSON TOO; if He can heal in the name of Jesus; WHY CAN'T YOU? Instantly I was transported right back to January 1st, when I discovered just how much of this whole faith thing I don't understand. I really want to be healed of several things, but you know what else I want; and want even more? I want to have faith in my Lord and Savior; the One who gave up His life so that I could live.

I am beginning to see how God is using this journey in my life, not only teaching me patience to wait on His will; but teaching me that I still have a lot to learn. I am reminded every day, just how much I have to learn. I see 100's of examples in my Bible where I'm not the only one who had to learn this lesson, or didn't learn it well enough even. David, a man after God's own heart, gave into sin. His son, Solomon let his many foreign wives lead him into worshiping other gods. So I have faith that I'm not alone on this journey that I'm taking. I see examples of the past and hear comments that let me know that in the present I'm not alone either. I pray we all can continue to walk on, and learn from mistakes we see in the Bible and even those that we make on our own.

Challenge in Patience

1 Thessalonians 5:17
   "17 Never stop praying."

I was listening to the radio this past week and I head something that made me stop to think. I heard one of those "2 minute devotional" type things on Air 1, and the speaker challenged the listener to pray for 5 unbeleivers for six months and see how thier lives changed. I, of course, started thinking about who I'd pray for if I met that challenge, but then I actually started thinking about the challenge its self, and how this particular challenge seemed to fit into my desire to learn patience.

Philippians 1:4
    "4 Whenever I pray, I make my requests for all of you with joy,"

In a world known for instant gratification, paitence seems to be a way of the past; and what better way to activly start learning about it then to pray for six months for one group of people! So I took up the gauntlet then and there; chose my five and started on my prayer journey to see not only what will change in their lives but also to see what I learn as well.

1 Thesalonians 1:2
    "2 We always thank God for all of you and pray for you constantly."

My five are a coworker, a friends spouse, two of my husbands work assosiates and a loved one of my own. I've proupsly left them vauge because I don't want anyone who might read this to feel pointed out, or called out or anything like that. So far in my challenge, I focused on the first person and tend to miss the last, so I'm redoubling my efforts to make sure all get a "fair shake" if you will.

Psalm 27:7
    "7 Hear me as I pray, O Lord. Be merciful and answer me!"

I wanted to blog about this today because I fell like I'm going to need accountability on this. I really want to see what awesome things that God has planned for these five people he's laid on my heart. So I'm asking you, my dedicated few, to help me out I plan to place a reminder in my phone to have me write a blog about updates every month. Even if those updates consist of me explaining what I'm learning about patience from this exercise!

My Next Step.

Proverbs 16:9

    "9 We can make our plans,
but the Lord determines our steps."

Powerful words found here in Proverbs! As I was reading today, I ran across these words and they gave me pause. Could this be a MAJOR step towards patience for me? I think that I have stated before that I'm a major planner, so does this mean that my plans are never going to come true?

I don't think the author of Proverbs was trying to tell me that no matter what; God's plans aren't my plans, but I do think he was trying to remind us all that God is the one who determines our steps, He is the one who has our ultimate good in mind. What looks good to me today may not be what God has planned for me tomorrow. I think that, for me at least, I need to remember this when I'm thinking about my journey towards patience.

I have to start looking at it this way: achieving my wants, dreams and desires are what I've been trying to learn patience for right? Well now I need to think about if those same wants, dreams and desires are what God wants for me. I've always tired to do this, but I think that reading this verse helps me to see that God really is guiding me, and He really wants me to succeed in the best way possible. As a planner, I am that person who would like to know what I'm doing way in advance so that I can put a plan of attack into place. For example several of my friends and my family are planning to take a cruise at the end of April; so now I have a plan to have my down payment by such a date, my full payment by such a date and my spending money at such a date. Now I can plan all of this out, and what activities I want to do while on vacation, but even if I plan everything down to the last minute and have an "air tight" plan; it is God who really make all of our plans. 

Sometimes verses like this can become mighty depressing. If God plans everything out for us, what is our point or purpose? I am not so sure I have a great answer for that, but I do know that  God has never let me down personally. When I feel like my world is caving in on me, I hold tight to His word and then when I'm through the storm; I can look back and see exactly what it was that I learned from a situation. I can chose to become depressed by this verse or I can chose to take it to heart and continue my journey towards patience and knowledge. I chose my journey; what do you chose?

Prayers for the Hamil family

Last night we had a wild ride! I live in the heart of Tornado Alley here in Oklahoma, and last night we proved the name. We had several tornadoes touching down in the central part of the state last night, but none so devastating, so on my mind and in my prayers as the one that ripped through Piedmont, Oklahoma. This tornado did so much damage, but most devastatingly it ripped a family apart. Literally.

One family was in their bathtub with a mattress over them when the tornado ripped through the house, tearing a 5 year old girl, a 3 year old boy and 15 month old baby boy from their mothers protective hands. The 5 year old and 15 month old were found last night as well as the pregnant mother. I was informed this morning that the 15 month old passed away from the injuries he received. The mother and daughter had surgeries today, but are still doing very badly. As of 5:45pm local time, the search for precious little Ryan (the 3 year old boy) is still going.
This family is in desperate need of prayers. I'm so proud of my state that has gathered around this family and have even created a facebook page to "collect" prayers for them, that page is called Prayers for the Hamil family-find Ryan.

I know that I serve a wonderful, awesome God who can protect, and bring this baby home to his hurting family. The Bible tells us all the time that He will do anything for us; I just wrote about it yesterday morning when I wrote on John 14:14 "14 If ye shall ask any thing in my name, I will do it" I never suspected that I'd be using this verse so quickly, and in such a different way then I thought. This family needs that God healing, God rescue much more then I could ever dream of needing it right now. 


I wanted to reach as many people as possible with this message; so I came to the most "international" place I know, my blog. I try not ask to much on this, my blog, because it is a journal of the things I'm learning, but I do ask this: PLEASE PRAY FOR THIS FAMILY! They are going through so very much right now and covet all the prayers they can get to help in healing, guilt (the poor father was out of town when all of this took place), and of course rescue. Thank you so much for reading, and praying. 

Geeennnnieee of theeee lamp...?

John 14:13-14
     "13 You can ask for anything in my name, and I will do it, so that the Son can bring glory to the Father. 14 Yes, ask me for anything in my name, and I will do it!"

This verse has a lot of years noted next to it in my Bible! It seems as if it comes up in my life at exactly the right times. I don't particularly remember May as being a hard month, but I remember some of those years being overly tough. How awesome, that we can ask for ANYTHING in His name and He will do it! Not only does He want to let us know that He'll do anything if we ask it in His name, but He wants us to understand that he is serious, so He repeats Himself.

I went to college to become a youth pastor, and while I didn't finish school, I did learn some things while I was there. One of those things that I learned, was really more of a joke, but "all good pastors will have three points in their sermons, and if they want their congregations to remember something, they will repeat it." It appears that at least part of this philosophy is Biblical! I always understood where they were coming from on that one, for me, learning is a memory thing. I've always struggled with spelling, I just don't do it well; and have discovered that spell check is my friend. When I was little, my mom's solution was to "look it up" but unfortunately for me, looking it up requires knowing how to spell; at least a little bit. So instead of always asking people how to spell something, I would try and write it down (once I knew how to spell it) repeatedly so that if nothing else, my fingers would remember how to write the word (this has become much easier now that I type most things!!) so I see the point in repeating ones self to drive a point home.

Jesus isn't driving just any point home here, He is making it very clear to us that He will take care of us; at least that is how I see it. I don't know if it's because I'm a female and automatically want to take care of people, or if I just see Jesus in a nurturing kind of way; but I feel like He is the ultimate care giver. I don't think this verse is telling us we should just ask for things left and right, after all; Jesus is not the Genie on Aladdin! God has always been like a wonderful parent that teaches His children well. That means if we mess up, there are consequences, He won't just give us all the money in the world with out our having earned it. I don't want to get to "deep" here, but since He gave us free will (link is to dictionary.com's definition of free will); we have the choice to do what we want, but we will also have to pay the price for those choices. There are many examples of this throughout the Bible, from God repeatedly letting the Israelites lose in battle to Jesus dying on the cross to save us from our sin. Like all good parents, God wants to see us suceed in life, so if we ask Him; in Jesus Name, He'll give us what we NEED.

I have to admit, it's very easy to blog on this subject, but a lot harder to believe it. For the past nearly six months I've been seeking paitence in my life, and I don't feel like I'm any closer now then I was at the begining. I want to take this verse and beg God to give me a baby, but I just don't think that is what God meant when He gave us this verse. I guess I'm not sure what He meant, only that asking implies choice; and I don't want something that God doesn't think is good for me. I just have a hard time seeing that a baby might not be good for me, right now.

This month has been rough on me, I felt my empty arms more so then normal, and my "lonliness" seems greater. I'm not sure if that is a direct resault of longing, or if my journey is starting to pay off. I have a feeling that it's my journey that is making it more noticeable for me. The longing that is in my heart has been there for a long time, but now that I am seriously learning things about paitence, I'm starting to see that as discontment in my walk with Christ, and that brings a bit of guilt with it. So, I'm taking this verse to heart today and I'm asking God for three things, a healing that would result in a baby in my arms, paitence to wait for that healing; and an understanding if that healing isn't in His will for my life. Hard prayer, but I already feel a little bit better by asking for that understanding as well.